Wednesday, March 28, 2012
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
For All Eternity by Lund
Frustration comes from unmet expectations
Speak so clearly that we are not misunderstood
Content communicator. No guessing.
Communicate with respect. As equals.
Who owns the expectation?
Own your expectations.
24 hrs of no criticism
A. A. B. A. A. A. A. B. A. A. A. A.
A. A. C. A. B. C. B. B. B. A. A. A.
A. A. A. 18 A. 6B. 2C
Unconditional love and acceptance.
Magnificent 7 daily
I love you with eye contact
15 min spouse's choice
Note of appreciation
Hug 10 sec
Kiss 5 sec
Talk 30 min
Stop seeking the storms and more fully enjoy the sunlight.
Alpha wolf. Feed love
Cultivate the art of complimenting and bldg. March 6, 94. Hinkley.
Complaining is something that children do. powerless.
Past. Learn from it. Forgive.
Hes had what he could. No more of me my today's or my tomorrow.
Build a history of positive behavior
Take our love to our families and our frustrations to the lord.
Who needs your live and not your condemnation.
Her sins are forgiven for she has loved much
Speak so clearly that we are not misunderstood
Content communicator. No guessing.
Communicate with respect. As equals.
Who owns the expectation?
Own your expectations.
24 hrs of no criticism
A. A. B. A. A. A. A. B. A. A. A. A.
A. A. C. A. B. C. B. B. B. A. A. A.
A. A. A. 18 A. 6B. 2C
Unconditional love and acceptance.
Magnificent 7 daily
I love you with eye contact
15 min spouse's choice
Note of appreciation
Hug 10 sec
Kiss 5 sec
Talk 30 min
Stop seeking the storms and more fully enjoy the sunlight.
Alpha wolf. Feed love
Cultivate the art of complimenting and bldg. March 6, 94. Hinkley.
Complaining is something that children do. powerless.
Past. Learn from it. Forgive.
Hes had what he could. No more of me my today's or my tomorrow.
Build a history of positive behavior
Take our love to our families and our frustrations to the lord.
Who needs your live and not your condemnation.
Her sins are forgiven for she has loved much
Women of Destiny
Women of Destiny: Reflection on the relief society declaration
We must have the courage to be imperfect
Distraught and distracted are side effects of living life in the fast lane
Where is the inner stillness? PHolland oct 87
The home it is not a monastery for perfect people sometimes it is a hospital where we nurse and take care of those we love. Holland 1997
I have come to believe that whatever we really want, we'll probably get. 50 years from now what we have become shouldn't surprise us because we will have become what we have set our hearts upon. Dew
At youth, our face reveals genetics. at 50 we have the face we deserve. TG Madsen
You gain strength courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do. Eleanor Roosevelt
Story: Mary fielding smith. Faith to have ox healed.
Desire faith prayer hope patientce courage love
To give of one's self is a holy gift SW Kimball
The one sure measure on a person's conversion is how he or she treated others
Do you want to be happy forget yourself and get lost in this great cods lend your efforts to helping people work to lift and serve his sons and daughters you will come to know hey happiness that you have never known GB Hinckley
(Religion) is manifested by the kind of people we are ...by the way we treat other people MD hanks
The royal law of love 1988
If you will always be more fair and more kind to others then a few of them may sometimes be to you, you will enjoy every sweet blessing life affords
When we put God first all other things phone into their proper place or drop out of our lives would be great Commandments 198 8ET Benson
Who could be trusted more (as a mentor) then this combination: the Lord, his mouth piece, and the Holy Ghost the VH PIerce 96
Prayer is not a matter of asking only it should not be always as the beggars upturned hand. often the purpose of prayer is to give us strength to do what needs to be done, wisdom to see the way to solve our problems, and ability to do our best in our tasks. elder RL Evans 73
Hearing aids:
1-revitalize your Sunday worship
2- pray to know God's will
3- immerse self in Scriptures
Doxey 91
I am satisfied, however, that in this (direction from the spirit) respect we live far beneath our privileges. Brigham young 1867
Leader in the home in the warm spirit of the priesthood.
With good humor andgood disposition and genuine consideration of the needs of the other they set out to make it a happy life.
Married people are sweethearts. They should be best friends. dearer to me and life than life itself.
Eternal Marriage MD Hanks 84
The most important thing we can do with our time is to strengthen our family members. to build homes inside of houses. Make home and family your treasure. wholeheartedly give them your time, energ,y and avid attention. VJensen '02
We give for each other on a daily basis when we endeavor always to make each other happy. I know of no other place then home where more happiness can be found in this life. I picture heaven to be a continuation of the ideal home. Choules 94
The secret of a happy marriage is to serve God and each other ET Benson 82
Femininity is the divine adornment of humanity. It is part of your inner beauty. Faust 2000
The world has enough women who are tough. We need women who are tender, refined, faith, goodness, purity Nadauld 2000
The church leaders need women of the church to stand with us and for us. together we must stand faithful and firm hunter 92
Every thing we do can be performed in a spirit of selfless love and service me smoot 01
If we are to walk in the steps of the Savior we cannot do it without personal sacrifice and sincere involvement. it is rarely convenient; but love extends beyond convenience for those who have conditioned themselves to look for opportunities to serve. JR Clark 81
Confined to her bed, my mother was always home- attentive, interested, and always available. JH backroom 95's
God does notice us and he watches over us. But it is usually through another person that he meets our needs. SW Kimball 74
Do not, however, make the mistake of being drawn into secondary tasks which will cause the neglect of your eternal assignment as mothers SW Kimball 79
"It's about time" and choices M E Edmonds 98
We want our homes to be blessed with sister scriptorians. distinct and different. SWKimball
Temple. Sacrifice of time. Serving vicariously is a sacrifice that purifies our hearts. Eternal perspective. Natures change. Just being there does not sanctify us. VHPierce 01
We go to love temple to make covenants, but we go home to keep the covenants that we have made.
if I would get to go anywhere in the world, I would go home. I would go home and sit in a big rocking chair and take a couple of grandbabies in my arms and hope that a little of the heavenly dust they still have on them would rub off on me. J B Washburn
The path is not soft, green grass it is not without hardship and heartache. EL Jack 94
D&C 84:88 angels round about
Distraught and distracted are side effects of living life in the fast lane
Where is the inner stillness? PHolland oct 87
The home it is not a monastery for perfect people sometimes it is a hospital where we nurse and take care of those we love. Holland 1997
I have come to believe that whatever we really want, we'll probably get. 50 years from now what we have become shouldn't surprise us because we will have become what we have set our hearts upon. Dew
At youth, our face reveals genetics. at 50 we have the face we deserve. TG Madsen
You gain strength courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do. Eleanor Roosevelt
Story: Mary fielding smith. Faith to have ox healed.
Desire faith prayer hope patientce courage love
To give of one's self is a holy gift SW Kimball
The one sure measure on a person's conversion is how he or she treated others
Do you want to be happy forget yourself and get lost in this great cods lend your efforts to helping people work to lift and serve his sons and daughters you will come to know hey happiness that you have never known GB Hinckley
(Religion) is manifested by the kind of people we are ...by the way we treat other people MD hanks
The royal law of love 1988
If you will always be more fair and more kind to others then a few of them may sometimes be to you, you will enjoy every sweet blessing life affords
When we put God first all other things phone into their proper place or drop out of our lives would be great Commandments 198 8ET Benson
Who could be trusted more (as a mentor) then this combination: the Lord, his mouth piece, and the Holy Ghost the VH PIerce 96
Prayer is not a matter of asking only it should not be always as the beggars upturned hand. often the purpose of prayer is to give us strength to do what needs to be done, wisdom to see the way to solve our problems, and ability to do our best in our tasks. elder RL Evans 73
Hearing aids:
1-revitalize your Sunday worship
2- pray to know God's will
3- immerse self in Scriptures
Doxey 91
I am satisfied, however, that in this (direction from the spirit) respect we live far beneath our privileges. Brigham young 1867
Leader in the home in the warm spirit of the priesthood.
With good humor andgood disposition and genuine consideration of the needs of the other they set out to make it a happy life.
Married people are sweethearts. They should be best friends. dearer to me and life than life itself.
Eternal Marriage MD Hanks 84
The most important thing we can do with our time is to strengthen our family members. to build homes inside of houses. Make home and family your treasure. wholeheartedly give them your time, energ,y and avid attention. VJensen '02
We give for each other on a daily basis when we endeavor always to make each other happy. I know of no other place then home where more happiness can be found in this life. I picture heaven to be a continuation of the ideal home. Choules 94
The secret of a happy marriage is to serve God and each other ET Benson 82
Femininity is the divine adornment of humanity. It is part of your inner beauty. Faust 2000
The world has enough women who are tough. We need women who are tender, refined, faith, goodness, purity Nadauld 2000
The church leaders need women of the church to stand with us and for us. together we must stand faithful and firm hunter 92
Every thing we do can be performed in a spirit of selfless love and service me smoot 01
If we are to walk in the steps of the Savior we cannot do it without personal sacrifice and sincere involvement. it is rarely convenient; but love extends beyond convenience for those who have conditioned themselves to look for opportunities to serve. JR Clark 81
Confined to her bed, my mother was always home- attentive, interested, and always available. JH backroom 95's
God does notice us and he watches over us. But it is usually through another person that he meets our needs. SW Kimball 74
Do not, however, make the mistake of being drawn into secondary tasks which will cause the neglect of your eternal assignment as mothers SW Kimball 79
"It's about time" and choices M E Edmonds 98
We want our homes to be blessed with sister scriptorians. distinct and different. SWKimball
Temple. Sacrifice of time. Serving vicariously is a sacrifice that purifies our hearts. Eternal perspective. Natures change. Just being there does not sanctify us. VHPierce 01
We go to love temple to make covenants, but we go home to keep the covenants that we have made.
if I would get to go anywhere in the world, I would go home. I would go home and sit in a big rocking chair and take a couple of grandbabies in my arms and hope that a little of the heavenly dust they still have on them would rub off on me. J B Washburn
The path is not soft, green grass it is not without hardship and heartache. EL Jack 94
D&C 84:88 angels round about
Love and logic for early childhood
Make the home as similar as possible to the real world
To save or not to save? That is the question
No warnings
How many choices can I give them today?
Hitting, throwing, yelling, screaming, kicking, throwing tantrums equals automatic bedroom
Learning from the pain of poor choices must happen in a loving way
Hold of your tongue and refrain from sarcasm
Good thinking! you figured that out by yourself!
Go hard of hearing, but explain why become a broken record
Expected to solve own problems
Wise parents do whatever they can to meet their young children's needs. They set limits on wants.
There is 1 cardinal rule for the first few months of a child's life: do everything to meet your infant's basic needs! p123
Notice and value their interests
Keep it simple and have fun
Toy Bermuda triangle. Feel free to keep the toys you pick up
Key phrase: oh dear. That's too bad. Looks like a little bedroom time. Gently lead or carry child to his room Keep them locked in the room until they have calmed down. May last longer than an hour. Act. Keep mouth shut.
Do not say a word. Let the actions speak for themselves.
Actions speak louder than words
Pour on the attention when sweet
Everything you say is gold.
Listen the first time
Control: the more we give, the more we get
What are you going to do to fix this?
Change child's location and remove offending objects
Both the parents and the child feel good afterward
Energy drain: how are you going to recharge me?
The babysitter routine: how are you planning on paying for the babysitter?
I'm going to have to do something about this, but not now
Spanking: we used to do that but not anymore
Set up the limit once and follow through
Children learn to behave differently for different adults based on what is expected of them (nurser, primary, friends)
Started when the kids are young enough to carry, so can enjoy teen years with kids who are respectful, responsible, and fun to be around.
Power of roughhousing
Leaders: set limits and get people to fall in love with them.
Dictators bark orders, inhibit problem solving, and create teenagers that can't think for themselves
Helicopter/search and rescue: hover no accountability, hostile dependency, resentment
Simple actions taken early on avoid major, painful ones later in life
Anger and frustration feed Misbehavior
Set the limit once and follow through
Don't: use threats you can't back up, try to reason with a child when upset, get frustrated angry or give in to demands.
Do: go brain-dead, smile, pause and explain; choose an empathetic one liner and deliver with compassion. Keep repeating the one-liner: "I love you too much to argue"
if the child continues, walk away
Give away healthy control within limits and take away unhealthy control that damages relationships. Sometimes we have to make our kids really mad so they can be happier and more responsible long-term
What are you feeding that kid? "Chores"
Meaningful chores give children a sense of purpose and a sense of really being needed. They believe they can accomplish almost anything if they work hard enough. Let them work through challenging tasks and problems. Play together and work together at an early age
Do not pay for chores. They are a contribution to the family. Build positive feelings about helping out around the house. Do not nag, remind, hover, or warn.
Children make fewer mistakes when we know longer fear that they will
A cowboy that bonds with his colts can easily break them when grown.
What I liked most:Set the limit once. No reminders. Act
Physically remove child from situation.
Add latches outside of bedroom door
Key phrases: oh dear, I love you too much to...
Offer frequent and more choices
No warnings
How many choices can I give them today?
Hitting, throwing, yelling, screaming, kicking, throwing tantrums equals automatic bedroom
Learning from the pain of poor choices must happen in a loving way
Hold of your tongue and refrain from sarcasm
Good thinking! you figured that out by yourself!
Go hard of hearing, but explain why become a broken record
Expected to solve own problems
Wise parents do whatever they can to meet their young children's needs. They set limits on wants.
There is 1 cardinal rule for the first few months of a child's life: do everything to meet your infant's basic needs! p123
Notice and value their interests
Keep it simple and have fun
Toy Bermuda triangle. Feel free to keep the toys you pick up
Key phrase: oh dear. That's too bad. Looks like a little bedroom time. Gently lead or carry child to his room Keep them locked in the room until they have calmed down. May last longer than an hour. Act. Keep mouth shut.
Do not say a word. Let the actions speak for themselves.
Actions speak louder than words
Pour on the attention when sweet
Everything you say is gold.
Listen the first time
Control: the more we give, the more we get
What are you going to do to fix this?
Change child's location and remove offending objects
Both the parents and the child feel good afterward
Energy drain: how are you going to recharge me?
The babysitter routine: how are you planning on paying for the babysitter?
I'm going to have to do something about this, but not now
Spanking: we used to do that but not anymore
Set up the limit once and follow through
Children learn to behave differently for different adults based on what is expected of them (nurser, primary, friends)
Started when the kids are young enough to carry, so can enjoy teen years with kids who are respectful, responsible, and fun to be around.
Power of roughhousing
Leaders: set limits and get people to fall in love with them.
Dictators bark orders, inhibit problem solving, and create teenagers that can't think for themselves
Helicopter/search and rescue: hover no accountability, hostile dependency, resentment
Simple actions taken early on avoid major, painful ones later in life
Anger and frustration feed Misbehavior
Set the limit once and follow through
Don't: use threats you can't back up, try to reason with a child when upset, get frustrated angry or give in to demands.
Do: go brain-dead, smile, pause and explain; choose an empathetic one liner and deliver with compassion. Keep repeating the one-liner: "I love you too much to argue"
if the child continues, walk away
Give away healthy control within limits and take away unhealthy control that damages relationships. Sometimes we have to make our kids really mad so they can be happier and more responsible long-term
What are you feeding that kid? "Chores"
Meaningful chores give children a sense of purpose and a sense of really being needed. They believe they can accomplish almost anything if they work hard enough. Let them work through challenging tasks and problems. Play together and work together at an early age
Do not pay for chores. They are a contribution to the family. Build positive feelings about helping out around the house. Do not nag, remind, hover, or warn.
Children make fewer mistakes when we know longer fear that they will
A cowboy that bonds with his colts can easily break them when grown.
What I liked most:Set the limit once. No reminders. Act
Physically remove child from situation.
Add latches outside of bedroom door
Key phrases: oh dear, I love you too much to...
Offer frequent and more choices
Outliers
The study of success, in hopes of providing like opportunities to more people.
The values of the world we inhabit and the people we surround ourselves with have a profound effect on who we are.
Self-fulfilling prophecy: a false definition, in the beginning, evokes a new behavior which makes the original false conception come true.
Accumulative Advantage: abundance of small opportunities make a big difference.
Outliers start out just a little bit better, and consequently, are treated as such early on. High/ gifted groups, better teams
Achievement is talent plus preparation
10,000 hour rule: the thing that distinguishes one performer from the another is how hard he or she works. 2000 vs 10000 by age 20.
It takes ten years of full time practice to hit 10,000 hours and master something.
Bill Gates had a "lucky series of events"
Practical Intelligence: They have the smarts and the Savvy to get what they want from the world. "Knowing what to say to whom, knowing when to say it, and knowing how to say it for maximum effect." p 101
Able to read situations correctly to get what you want.
Entitlement can have two meanings: bratty, whiny, demanding vs. high expectations, respectful relations with authority, confident. Confidence: as good as anyone else and deserving of respectful and good treatment; pride: better than anyone else, hence deserving special treatment. World revolves around them vs being a contribute in a revolving world.
They know the Rules of the Game. An attitude suited to succeeding in the modern world.
"Concerted Cultivation" (providing opportunities and setting children up for success) vs accomplishment of natural growth (caring for)
Comfortable in a variety of settings, and in asking for attention vs timid
Family Background: books, parents with college degrees, sufficient $. Alert, poised, attractive, well dressed. P 112
Successful people don't do it alone.
Satisfying work: autonomy, complexity, and a connection between effort and reward
If you work hard enough and assert yourself, and use your mind and imagination, you can shape the world to your desires.
Powers of persuasion and initiative
Communicating in the sense of encouraging, cajoling, calming, negotiating, and sharing information in the clearest and most transparent manner possible. P 192
"Mitigated speech" attempts to downplay or sugarcoat the meaning of what is being said. We mitigate when we're being polite or when were ashamed or embarrassed or when we're being deferential to authority. P 194
Six levels of mitigation: command, obligation statement, suggestion, query, preference, and hint.
Fear of being blunt. Don't be afraid to speak up-- clearly and assertively.
I statements. "I'm concerned about, I'm uncomfortable with..."
Not obnoxious, pushy, or egotistical- just sees the world differently.
All they had to say is, 'we can't do that'
Power Distance Index: level of value and respect for authority and level of special privileges they get. How do we reduce power differences? Equality.
Advocate for opinions in a stronger way.
Western cultural context: if there is confusion, it is the fault of the speaker. Eastern cultures believe it is the fault of the listener.
The aviation industry learned how to make success out of the unsuccessful by taking a look at their culture and 're-norming' them to take the initiative and be straightforward in communications.
No one who can rise before dawn 360 days a year fails to make his family rich.
Outliers work harder than their peers. Working really hard is what successful people do. P 238
It's not so much ability as attitude. Success is a function of persistence and the willingness to work hard rather than giving up quickly.
Those who succeed on the math test are the same students who are willing to concentrate and sit still long enough to focus on answering a lengthy questionnaire. Page 248
Effort and hard work are in direct proportion to success.
Persistence Test: American children lasted 9.4 minutes, Japanese lasted for 13.9 minutes.
SSLANT: smile, sit up, listen, ask questions, nod when being spoken to, and track with your eyes.
School days: US 180, Korea 220, Japan 243.
Endurance, motivation, incentives and rewards, fun, discipline, grit, and self-control.
Meaningful teaching is time-consuming. It seems counterintuitive but we do things at a slower pace and as a result we get through a lot more. Better retention, deepened understanding, plus more relaxed.
KIPP schools transform losers into winners-- because they have 50-60% more learning Time.
Outliers are those who have been given opportunities- and who have had the strength and presence of mind to see them. It is a gift.
What is success to me? What do I hope to succeed at? Wife, mother, neighbor, friend. Serving others, scriptorian, reading,
The values of the world we inhabit and the people we surround ourselves with have a profound effect on who we are.
Self-fulfilling prophecy: a false definition, in the beginning, evokes a new behavior which makes the original false conception come true.
Accumulative Advantage: abundance of small opportunities make a big difference.
Outliers start out just a little bit better, and consequently, are treated as such early on. High/ gifted groups, better teams
Achievement is talent plus preparation
10,000 hour rule: the thing that distinguishes one performer from the another is how hard he or she works. 2000 vs 10000 by age 20.
It takes ten years of full time practice to hit 10,000 hours and master something.
Bill Gates had a "lucky series of events"
Practical Intelligence: They have the smarts and the Savvy to get what they want from the world. "Knowing what to say to whom, knowing when to say it, and knowing how to say it for maximum effect." p 101
Able to read situations correctly to get what you want.
Entitlement can have two meanings: bratty, whiny, demanding vs. high expectations, respectful relations with authority, confident. Confidence: as good as anyone else and deserving of respectful and good treatment; pride: better than anyone else, hence deserving special treatment. World revolves around them vs being a contribute in a revolving world.
They know the Rules of the Game. An attitude suited to succeeding in the modern world.
"Concerted Cultivation" (providing opportunities and setting children up for success) vs accomplishment of natural growth (caring for)
Comfortable in a variety of settings, and in asking for attention vs timid
Family Background: books, parents with college degrees, sufficient $. Alert, poised, attractive, well dressed. P 112
Successful people don't do it alone.
Satisfying work: autonomy, complexity, and a connection between effort and reward
If you work hard enough and assert yourself, and use your mind and imagination, you can shape the world to your desires.
Powers of persuasion and initiative
Communicating in the sense of encouraging, cajoling, calming, negotiating, and sharing information in the clearest and most transparent manner possible. P 192
"Mitigated speech" attempts to downplay or sugarcoat the meaning of what is being said. We mitigate when we're being polite or when were ashamed or embarrassed or when we're being deferential to authority. P 194
Six levels of mitigation: command, obligation statement, suggestion, query, preference, and hint.
Fear of being blunt. Don't be afraid to speak up-- clearly and assertively.
I statements. "I'm concerned about, I'm uncomfortable with..."
Not obnoxious, pushy, or egotistical- just sees the world differently.
All they had to say is, 'we can't do that'
Power Distance Index: level of value and respect for authority and level of special privileges they get. How do we reduce power differences? Equality.
Advocate for opinions in a stronger way.
Western cultural context: if there is confusion, it is the fault of the speaker. Eastern cultures believe it is the fault of the listener.
The aviation industry learned how to make success out of the unsuccessful by taking a look at their culture and 're-norming' them to take the initiative and be straightforward in communications.
No one who can rise before dawn 360 days a year fails to make his family rich.
Outliers work harder than their peers. Working really hard is what successful people do. P 238
It's not so much ability as attitude. Success is a function of persistence and the willingness to work hard rather than giving up quickly.
Those who succeed on the math test are the same students who are willing to concentrate and sit still long enough to focus on answering a lengthy questionnaire. Page 248
Effort and hard work are in direct proportion to success.
Persistence Test: American children lasted 9.4 minutes, Japanese lasted for 13.9 minutes.
SSLANT: smile, sit up, listen, ask questions, nod when being spoken to, and track with your eyes.
School days: US 180, Korea 220, Japan 243.
Endurance, motivation, incentives and rewards, fun, discipline, grit, and self-control.
Meaningful teaching is time-consuming. It seems counterintuitive but we do things at a slower pace and as a result we get through a lot more. Better retention, deepened understanding, plus more relaxed.
KIPP schools transform losers into winners-- because they have 50-60% more learning Time.
Outliers are those who have been given opportunities- and who have had the strength and presence of mind to see them. It is a gift.
What is success to me? What do I hope to succeed at? Wife, mother, neighbor, friend. Serving others, scriptorian, reading,
A BOM Benson
“The Lord works from the inside out. The world works from the outside in. The world would take people out of the slums. Christ takes the slums out of the people, and then they take themselves out of the slums. The world would mold men by changing their environment. Christ changes men, who then change their environment. The world would shape human behavior, but Christ can change human nature”
“When we put God first, all other things fall into their proper place or drop out of our lives. Our love of the Lord will govern the claims for our affection, the demands on our time, the interests we pursue, and the order of our priorities”
“It is not just that the Book of Mormon teaches us truth, though it indeed does that. It is not just that the Book of Mormon bears testimony of Christ, though it indeed does that, too. But there is something more. There is a power in the book which will begin to flow into your lives the moment you begin a serious study of the book. You will find greater power to resist temptation. You will find the power to avoid deception. You will find the power to stay on the strait and narrow path. The scriptures are called ‘the words of life’, and nowhere is that more true than it is of the Book of Mormon. When you begin to hunger and thirst after those words, you will find life in greater and greater abundance”
“I promise you that, with increased attendance in the temples of our God, you shall receive increased personal revelation to bless your life as you bless those who have died”
Missionaries going into the field with hundreds of scriptures memorized
Your patriarchal blessing
Gifts I would like to obtain. Pray specifically and act as if I already possess them:
-Charity. Tender heartedness. Kindness. Warmth. Love. Patience.
Generous heart.
Non assuming, judgemental, or critical.
-Honesty. At any cost.
-The Constant companionship of the Holy Ghost.
-Reverence.
-Stillness.
- Forgiving. Eliminate anger and hatred from my heart.
2 Cor 29-10 "Eye hath not seen nor ear heard... the things which God has prepared for them that Love Him."
Generous heart.
Non assuming, judgemental, or critical.
-Honesty. At any cost.
-The Constant companionship of the Holy Ghost.
-Reverence.
-Stillness.
- Forgiving. Eliminate anger and hatred from my heart.
2 Cor 29-10 "Eye hath not seen nor ear heard... the things which God has prepared for them that Love Him."
Follow the living prophets
Bad experiences are an expensive school that only fools keep going back to. Benson
Sustain: loyal, support, continually praying for leaders. A personal promise to give "full loyalty and support, without equivocation or reservation, to the officer for whom you vote.". HB Lee
The Lord's servants provide "the continual nourishment needed for spiritually healthy souls."
The Spirit gives us guidance in proportion to our individual faith, personal worthiness, and diligence in seeking the truth. It requires spiritual sensitivity gained through "the bending of the whole soul through worthy living." HB Lee
Counsel: all of us need counsel. "receiving counsel is a test of obedience by which the Lord magnifies His servants." ET Benson
Seek counsel constantly. D&C 122:2
Chastening leads to obedience. D&C 105:6
When we pray with all energy of soul, we are entitled to and will receive guidance. The mind and the will of the Lord as to the course we shall take will be made known unto us.
We have no agenda, only the Lord's agenda
The Lord's servants provide "the continual nourishment needed for spiritually healthy souls."
The Spirit gives us guidance in proportion to our individual faith, personal worthiness, and diligence in seeking the truth. It requires spiritual sensitivity gained through "the bending of the whole soul through worthy living." HB Lee
Counsel: all of us need counsel. "receiving counsel is a test of obedience by which the Lord magnifies His servants." ET Benson
Seek counsel constantly. D&C 122:2
Chastening leads to obedience. D&C 105:6
When we pray with all energy of soul, we are entitled to and will receive guidance. The mind and the will of the Lord as to the course we shall take will be made known unto us.
We have no agenda, only the Lord's agenda
Strangling your husband is not an option
-- how to improve as a wife
Shed mommy-ness and go back to being purely a wife
20/ infinity vision
Elder Kirkham "your name is safe in our home" and marriage
Give him time alone In his man cave, on outings and bike rides, free Mikey time.
Guys need guy- friends and girls need girl-friends
Take the time to look good. Dress like you're trying to get him to ask you out. He doesn't want to come home to a slug
Talk. Play. Flirt. Date. Compliment.
Have Faith in Mike. Believe in him and trust that he will make good choices.
I worry too much. Gain a testimony of our Marriage. Have complete trust in him, me, and us.
"Brethren, marry someone who is your better in some respects and, sisters, do likewise, so that your eternal partnership is one of compensating competencies. "NA Maxwell
'It's your responsibility, and I have faith and confidence in you that you'll do what's right.' Give him back his agency.
If you will treat your husband as if he possesses a certain attribute, over time he will begin to act as if he possesses that attribute. Eventually, that will become who he is. P 123
“If you treat an individual as he is, he will remain how he is. But if you treat him as if he were what he ought to be and could be, he will become what he ought to be and could be.”
― Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Quickly replace negative thoughts in your head with three positive ones
During this season in my life I'm enjoying my kids. but am I enjoying Mike?
Have Faith in him. Tell him you have faith in him.
Hold on to every hope that your marriage will develop into an excellent one.
Charity belongs more in marriage than anywhere else
Pray: help me to see all that is good about him
Our marriage is going to get the highest priority of my time, money, and energy
You're still courting him and getting him to fall in love with you all the time. Dazzle him!
The couple that plays together stays together.
Husbands benefit from having a very fun wife. Mysterious. Unpredictable. Spontaneous.
He wants a wife he can brag about.
Love and Logic for early childhood
Our noble intentions are often our worst enemy
God gave us considerable freedom. He did not approve of [Adam and Eve's] disobedience, He loved hem enough to let them make a decision and live with the results.
The best solution to any problem lies within the skin of the person who rightfully owns the problem.
Children lose respect for adults who cannot set limits and make them stick
Actions not words. Set the example. Think aloud. Let them learn to hear, trust, and listen to the voice in their heads.
Keep your mouths shut and save words for the happy times
The rule with "no" is that we use it as seldom as possible. "never tell a child no when you can tell them yes." Hinckley
Fight only the battles that we know we can win
No problem for the adult, big problem for the kid.
The world doesn't operate on a multiple-warning system
We keep our relationship with the child foremost in our minds. Our love for them reigns supreme. After the situation both individuals feel good about it and their dignity remains in tact.
When responsibility is placed squarely on their shoulders, and natural consequences are allowed to occur, they have nobody to be angry with but themselves
Let's love them enough to allow them to learn the necessary and crucial skills of responsible thinking and living.
Bullies: all of your life you will be around some fairly unpleasant people. How lucky for you to be learning to handle them now! Don't try to change the situation or amount of exposure, instead communicate with and teach the child though the process. If our relationship with our children remains communicative, they will generally choose friends that we like. They can make those decisions without our needing to.
Getting ready: Decide which job belongs to the parents and which to the youngersers. Stay out of the reminder business- say it once clearly and audibly then allow them to make the mistakes needed to learn. Don't rescue! Replace anger with empathy.
Enthuse over the positive and be nonemotional about the negative. Let the attention flourish on the positive and happy child. Ignore the misbehaving one.
Get involved in areas of a child's interest and where they excel
Tantrums: don't change them, just the location
Children don't naturally place limits on themselves; that is a parent's job
The best solution to any problem lies within the skin of the person who rightfully owns the problem.
Children lose respect for adults who cannot set limits and make them stick
Actions not words. Set the example. Think aloud. Let them learn to hear, trust, and listen to the voice in their heads.
Keep your mouths shut and save words for the happy times
The rule with "no" is that we use it as seldom as possible. "never tell a child no when you can tell them yes." Hinckley
Fight only the battles that we know we can win
No problem for the adult, big problem for the kid.
The world doesn't operate on a multiple-warning system
We keep our relationship with the child foremost in our minds. Our love for them reigns supreme. After the situation both individuals feel good about it and their dignity remains in tact.
When responsibility is placed squarely on their shoulders, and natural consequences are allowed to occur, they have nobody to be angry with but themselves
Let's love them enough to allow them to learn the necessary and crucial skills of responsible thinking and living.
Bullies: all of your life you will be around some fairly unpleasant people. How lucky for you to be learning to handle them now! Don't try to change the situation or amount of exposure, instead communicate with and teach the child though the process. If our relationship with our children remains communicative, they will generally choose friends that we like. They can make those decisions without our needing to.
Getting ready: Decide which job belongs to the parents and which to the youngersers. Stay out of the reminder business- say it once clearly and audibly then allow them to make the mistakes needed to learn. Don't rescue! Replace anger with empathy.
Enthuse over the positive and be nonemotional about the negative. Let the attention flourish on the positive and happy child. Ignore the misbehaving one.
Get involved in areas of a child's interest and where they excel
Tantrums: don't change them, just the location
Children don't naturally place limits on themselves; that is a parent's job
Daughters in My Kingdom
I LOVE this book!!!
I've worked in RS many years, and I am just beginning to get an insight into its greatness. Belle S Spafford
As I read this book, I received a rekindling of the vision and testimony of RS I was first blessed with in college. The burning gratitude returned, as did a sense of deepened purpose, focused desire, and a softened/ enlarged heart. I LOVE Relief Society and everything that it stands for and helps me to be. Some of the greatest blessings of friendship and service have come to me due to my membership and involvement in RS.
Purposes: Increase Faith and Personal Righteousness, strengthen families and homes, and provide relief by seeking out and helping those in need. March 17, 1842
-Willing to give an portion, or all of my time.
-I stress... the deep need each woman has to study the scriptures. We want our homes to be blessed with sister scriptorians... Become scholars of the scriptures -not to put others down, but to lift them up. Kimball
-Let your first business be to perform your duties at home. Insamuch as you are wise stewards, you will find time for social duties. .. your capacity will increase, and you will be astonished at what you can accomplish. -ER Snow
-God does notice... it is usually through another person that he meets our needs. Kimball
-The RS is divinely made, divinely authorized, divinely instituted, divinely ordained of God to minister for the salvation of the souls of women and of men. JF Smith
-Once I started looking, I found all sorts of ways to help theses sisters help themselves and each other...
-I have tried not to suppress any inclinations to generous word or deed.
-You are the guardians of the hearth, you are the bearers of the children, You are they who nurture them and establish within them the habits of their lives. No other work reaches so close to divinity as doe the nurturing of the sons and daughters of God... We call upon parents to devote their best efforts to the teaching and rearing of their children in gospel principles. Hinckley
-Let your first business be to perform your duties at home. -ER Snow (never had children of her own)
- Call your children around you... and pray with them... warn them of the evils that surround us. Be diligent in all the duties of life, as mothers and wives... Let us be careful to speak with wisdom before our little ones, avoiding fault-finding, ... and cultivate the higher attributes of our nature, that will tend to elevate, refine, and purify the heart. We should take the utmost pains to teach the children of Zion to be honest, virtuous, upright and punctual in all their duties; also to be industrious and keep the Sabbath day holy. -ZDH Young
-There is an art to being a homemaker... it is important that we have a sanctuary- a place of refuge where we feel comfortable and where [others can too]. BW Winder
- To nurture means to cultivate, care for, and make grow. Mothers should create a climate for spiritual and temporal growth in their hoes. Another word for nurturing is homemaking. Home is where women have the most power and influence. Nurturing requires organization, patience, love, and work. -Beck
Emphasis: Temple, service, kindness, charity, modesty, virtue, gentle, self-reliant, educated, articulate, comfort, neighborly, thrift, duty, work, self-respect, cooperation, humanitarian efforts, sacrifice, covenants, sanctuary, refuge, sisterhood, healing, influential, wisdom, strength, righteousness, compassion, sanctify, devotion, tolerant, patient, merciful, love, accepting, support, encouragement, service, lift, tender, strengthen, beautiful, dedication, sacrifice, commitment, help, generous, prayer, entitled, energy, vision, thoroughness, genealogy, determined, wife, mother, family, Priesthood, blessings, ordinances, gifts, spirit, missionaries, seek, spiritual gifts, teaching, children, simplicity, defend, strength, homes, influence, study, faithful, pure, fortify, unity, one, perspective, prepared, vision, righteous, grow, attractive, Saint, leader, growth, homemaking, cultivate, model, enable, enrich, chaste, consecrate, duty, fullness, active, commandments, daughters, understanding, genuine, time, wholesome, care, peace, gladness, noble, light, truth, constant, privilege, exaltation, delight, resilience, tenacity, potential, motivate, example, gratitude, effort, outreach, gather, generations, member, bear, practice, legacy, bountiful, heart, witness, praise-worthy, friend, climb, encourage, labor, certain, effort, accomplish, devotion, extraordinary!
-Now, it is MY Turn... my turn to serve with charity and faith.
- Lay aside the things of this world, and seek for the things of a better... The angels cannot be restrained from being your associates.. if you will be pure, nothing can hinder. J Smith
As I read this book, I received a rekindling of the vision and testimony of RS I was first blessed with in college. The burning gratitude returned, as did a sense of deepened purpose, focused desire, and a softened/ enlarged heart. I LOVE Relief Society and everything that it stands for and helps me to be. Some of the greatest blessings of friendship and service have come to me due to my membership and involvement in RS.
Purposes: Increase Faith and Personal Righteousness, strengthen families and homes, and provide relief by seeking out and helping those in need. March 17, 1842
-Willing to give an portion, or all of my time.
-I stress... the deep need each woman has to study the scriptures. We want our homes to be blessed with sister scriptorians... Become scholars of the scriptures -not to put others down, but to lift them up. Kimball
-Let your first business be to perform your duties at home. Insamuch as you are wise stewards, you will find time for social duties. .. your capacity will increase, and you will be astonished at what you can accomplish. -ER Snow
-God does notice... it is usually through another person that he meets our needs. Kimball
-The RS is divinely made, divinely authorized, divinely instituted, divinely ordained of God to minister for the salvation of the souls of women and of men. JF Smith
-Once I started looking, I found all sorts of ways to help theses sisters help themselves and each other...
-I have tried not to suppress any inclinations to generous word or deed.
-You are the guardians of the hearth, you are the bearers of the children, You are they who nurture them and establish within them the habits of their lives. No other work reaches so close to divinity as doe the nurturing of the sons and daughters of God... We call upon parents to devote their best efforts to the teaching and rearing of their children in gospel principles. Hinckley
-Let your first business be to perform your duties at home. -ER Snow (never had children of her own)
- Call your children around you... and pray with them... warn them of the evils that surround us. Be diligent in all the duties of life, as mothers and wives... Let us be careful to speak with wisdom before our little ones, avoiding fault-finding, ... and cultivate the higher attributes of our nature, that will tend to elevate, refine, and purify the heart. We should take the utmost pains to teach the children of Zion to be honest, virtuous, upright and punctual in all their duties; also to be industrious and keep the Sabbath day holy. -ZDH Young
-There is an art to being a homemaker... it is important that we have a sanctuary- a place of refuge where we feel comfortable and where [others can too]. BW Winder
- To nurture means to cultivate, care for, and make grow. Mothers should create a climate for spiritual and temporal growth in their hoes. Another word for nurturing is homemaking. Home is where women have the most power and influence. Nurturing requires organization, patience, love, and work. -Beck
Emphasis: Temple, service, kindness, charity, modesty, virtue, gentle, self-reliant, educated, articulate, comfort, neighborly, thrift, duty, work, self-respect, cooperation, humanitarian efforts, sacrifice, covenants, sanctuary, refuge, sisterhood, healing, influential, wisdom, strength, righteousness, compassion, sanctify, devotion, tolerant, patient, merciful, love, accepting, support, encouragement, service, lift, tender, strengthen, beautiful, dedication, sacrifice, commitment, help, generous, prayer, entitled, energy, vision, thoroughness, genealogy, determined, wife, mother, family, Priesthood, blessings, ordinances, gifts, spirit, missionaries, seek, spiritual gifts, teaching, children, simplicity, defend, strength, homes, influence, study, faithful, pure, fortify, unity, one, perspective, prepared, vision, righteous, grow, attractive, Saint, leader, growth, homemaking, cultivate, model, enable, enrich, chaste, consecrate, duty, fullness, active, commandments, daughters, understanding, genuine, time, wholesome, care, peace, gladness, noble, light, truth, constant, privilege, exaltation, delight, resilience, tenacity, potential, motivate, example, gratitude, effort, outreach, gather, generations, member, bear, practice, legacy, bountiful, heart, witness, praise-worthy, friend, climb, encourage, labor, certain, effort, accomplish, devotion, extraordinary!
-Now, it is MY Turn... my turn to serve with charity and faith.
- Lay aside the things of this world, and seek for the things of a better... The angels cannot be restrained from being your associates.. if you will be pure, nothing can hinder. J Smith
The Ultimate Career
Do Less for their children so they can do More with them
We shape our houses then our houses shape us
Feed the positive, starve the negative
Mother is the heart of the home
Feed the positive, starve the negative
Mother is the heart of the home
Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother
If children do not excel in school, there is a problem and parents are not doing their job. We spend ten times the amount of time drilling academics with their kids.
Skills learned the diligent, disciplined, confidence- expanding way.
1) higher dreams for children
2) higher regard for their children in knowing how much they can take
Obedience is considered among the highest virtues.
"prosperity can never last for three generations. " ... Not on my watch.
Not going to raise a soft, entitled child. Classical music. Achievement.
I like clear goals and clear ways of measuring success.
With me at her side, she practiced piano at least 90 min every day, including weekends. On lesson days we practiced twice as long. I never paid her a penny.
Tenacious practice, practice, practice is crucial for excellence; rote repetition is underrated in America.
Nothing is fun until you're good at it.
I did well at law school by working psychotically hard.
"Everything valuable and worthwhile is difficult!"
I won't let her indulge her own inner doubts.
Chinese children practice ten hrs day
We Read to them for one hour ever night
Demand perfect grades bc they believe their child can get them. If not, the child did not work hard enough. Will then do 100s of practice tests with the child.
One of the worst things you can do for a child's self esteem is to let them give up.
Confidence comes from learning you can do something you thought you couldn't
Find a happy medium between:
Western: respect, individuality, pursue passions, support choice, positive reinforcement, nurturing environment. Spontaneity, freedom, discovery, experience.
Chinese: prepare children for future, and see what they're capable of, arming them with skills, work habits, & inner confidence that no one can ever take away.
Every day that you don't practice is a day that you're getting worse.
Childhood: something fleeting and to be enjoyed vs. training period, a time to build character and invest in the future.
Limits create happiness, not unchecked freedom.
World travel as a family
She was challenged on a new level. Stimulated and intrigued.
Easing up would've been selling her short
You have to be strong and find a way to get through this
Gave them a sense of their own abilities and of the value of excellence.
Lesson: she has a diff personality and you can't force her. She's a sweet girl, don't be so hard on her.
It goes so fast. Before you know it your children are grown and gone.
All the hours of labor, fighting, aggravation, and misery. For what? If the child hates it, why force it?
Focus on What's really important
You have to work to be great
I focused my eyes on lulu, taking her in. She's indomitable and wherever she ends up, she is going to be amazing
Choice. Is what it all comes down to. Westerners believe in choice. Chinese do not.
I'm a huge believer in luck, and the harder I work the more I have of it. Thomas Jefferson
Life is so short and so fragile, and we should be trying to get the most out of every breath, every fleeting moment. But what does it mean to live life to its fullest?
1) higher dreams for children
2) higher regard for their children in knowing how much they can take
Obedience is considered among the highest virtues.
"prosperity can never last for three generations. " ... Not on my watch.
Not going to raise a soft, entitled child. Classical music. Achievement.
I like clear goals and clear ways of measuring success.
With me at her side, she practiced piano at least 90 min every day, including weekends. On lesson days we practiced twice as long. I never paid her a penny.
Tenacious practice, practice, practice is crucial for excellence; rote repetition is underrated in America.
Nothing is fun until you're good at it.
I did well at law school by working psychotically hard.
"Everything valuable and worthwhile is difficult!"
I won't let her indulge her own inner doubts.
Chinese children practice ten hrs day
We Read to them for one hour ever night
Demand perfect grades bc they believe their child can get them. If not, the child did not work hard enough. Will then do 100s of practice tests with the child.
One of the worst things you can do for a child's self esteem is to let them give up.
Confidence comes from learning you can do something you thought you couldn't
Find a happy medium between:
Western: respect, individuality, pursue passions, support choice, positive reinforcement, nurturing environment. Spontaneity, freedom, discovery, experience.
Chinese: prepare children for future, and see what they're capable of, arming them with skills, work habits, & inner confidence that no one can ever take away.
Every day that you don't practice is a day that you're getting worse.
Childhood: something fleeting and to be enjoyed vs. training period, a time to build character and invest in the future.
Limits create happiness, not unchecked freedom.
World travel as a family
She was challenged on a new level. Stimulated and intrigued.
Easing up would've been selling her short
You have to be strong and find a way to get through this
Gave them a sense of their own abilities and of the value of excellence.
Lesson: she has a diff personality and you can't force her. She's a sweet girl, don't be so hard on her.
It goes so fast. Before you know it your children are grown and gone.
All the hours of labor, fighting, aggravation, and misery. For what? If the child hates it, why force it?
Focus on What's really important
You have to work to be great
I focused my eyes on lulu, taking her in. She's indomitable and wherever she ends up, she is going to be amazing
Choice. Is what it all comes down to. Westerners believe in choice. Chinese do not.
I'm a huge believer in luck, and the harder I work the more I have of it. Thomas Jefferson
Life is so short and so fragile, and we should be trying to get the most out of every breath, every fleeting moment. But what does it mean to live life to its fullest?
What Latter-day stripling warriors learn from their mothers- Kapp
Yesteryears, where have they gone? Memories run through my mind back in time , of this childhood when he was mine.
Mothers see far beyond immaturity, messy rooms, poor grades, and wrong choices. They see their sons and daughters not as they are, but as they are becoming.
The making of a man begins in a mother's arms and at a mothers knee.
What first comes to your mind when you think of your mom?
It's the little things. Holding after getting hurt, cookies and a note, a 1:1 drive to the store, a conversation of intent listening.
Clearly defined, consistent boundaries (not barriers).
I will encircle thee in the arms of my love D&C 6:20 (mothers love)
Wherever mom was, that was my favorite room. That was usually where I went. P36
The Home is where mother is. Mother Teresa
She believed it, lived it, and passed it on to her son.
The Lord lost my list of expected blessings and replaced it with one of his own... I began to realize that the Lord's list of blessings wasn't that different from my own.
What stood out was her expression of joyful abundance as she leaned forward occasionally to look over her family, as it to be reassured of her wealth. Sitting in her same red silk dress, her face reflecting her inexpressible joy. 48
We read the scriptures at the dinner table before we eat.
She was a strict disciplinarian, and we always knew that when she told us to do anything she meant it. GA Smith
"A promise is a sacred thing, do not haste to make it. For once a promise has been made, you must be sure to keep it."
I know that my mom has been on her knees every day for me.
Provide opportunities for children to recognize the feelings of the spirit.
Loyalty. My mom is very loyal to my dad. She values his judgment and his opinion. Cheerful acceptance of her husband's leadership. Complete faith in him.
Parents who are loyal and loving to each other provide a great sense of strength and security for their children. The boys love it when we kiss, hug, and go on dates. They smile-- they are now the kissing nazis who make sure we kiss before Mike leaves for work.
Support, prayer, and letters an extra measure of strength for the battle on the front lines (when kids have moved out and are on their own)
Living in the world, but walking out of time. Stepping to his quiet drumming.
Who and Whose are they really?
My mother's trust in me was like bands of steel that could not be broken. I could not think of disappointing my mother.
God bless the mothers of today as they prepare the latter-day stripling warriors of tomorrow!
What a contrast between books and how I feel after reading them. Yesterday I read about the Chinese Tiger Mother. Constantly yelling at her two daughters. Blood pressure high, stress levels to the max, contention, disarray, lack of harmony and peace. Where's the loving mother/daughter bond with this cold, demanding drill sergeant? One daughter confident but doesn't know how to have fun, the other broken, lacking confidence, and fighting so hard to be her own self.
Contrast this to the faithful, strong, dependable "mediocre" athlete/student/musician missionaries who were nurtured and shaped by their mothers. The respect, admiration, and love they feel for their mothers and consequently toward humanity.
One book is of oppression at the expense of happiness in agency. The other is training a child in which to go and not departing from it. It's great to have a "successful" child based on the world's standards but not at the expense of having a well-adjusted and Successful child who knows who they are, knows who we all are, and contributes to the happiness of our Heavenly Father's children.
The kind of Mother I hope to be: Kind. Gentle. Soft-spoken. Sweet. Nurturing. Supportive. Caring. Still. Peaceful. Tender. Warm. Loving. Prayerful. Strong. Clear. Assertive. Strict. Teacher. Expectations. Energetic. Enthusiastic. Fun. I don't ever want to yell at my children, intentionally hurt their feelings, or disappoint them. I hope to have a strong tie and connection with them. To build a lasting and eternal relationship of trust, belief, love, and compassion. I want to be the kind of mother my kids want to be around. I want the room I'm in to be their favorite room. I want them to want to be with me forever, out of respect, love, and enjoyment, not resentment, obligation and fear.
The making of a man begins in a mother's arms and at a mothers knee.
What first comes to your mind when you think of your mom?
It's the little things. Holding after getting hurt, cookies and a note, a 1:1 drive to the store, a conversation of intent listening.
Clearly defined, consistent boundaries (not barriers).
I will encircle thee in the arms of my love D&C 6:20 (mothers love)
Wherever mom was, that was my favorite room. That was usually where I went. P36
The Home is where mother is. Mother Teresa
She believed it, lived it, and passed it on to her son.
The Lord lost my list of expected blessings and replaced it with one of his own... I began to realize that the Lord's list of blessings wasn't that different from my own.
What stood out was her expression of joyful abundance as she leaned forward occasionally to look over her family, as it to be reassured of her wealth. Sitting in her same red silk dress, her face reflecting her inexpressible joy. 48
We read the scriptures at the dinner table before we eat.
She was a strict disciplinarian, and we always knew that when she told us to do anything she meant it. GA Smith
"A promise is a sacred thing, do not haste to make it. For once a promise has been made, you must be sure to keep it."
I know that my mom has been on her knees every day for me.
Provide opportunities for children to recognize the feelings of the spirit.
Loyalty. My mom is very loyal to my dad. She values his judgment and his opinion. Cheerful acceptance of her husband's leadership. Complete faith in him.
Parents who are loyal and loving to each other provide a great sense of strength and security for their children. The boys love it when we kiss, hug, and go on dates. They smile-- they are now the kissing nazis who make sure we kiss before Mike leaves for work.
Support, prayer, and letters an extra measure of strength for the battle on the front lines (when kids have moved out and are on their own)
Living in the world, but walking out of time. Stepping to his quiet drumming.
Who and Whose are they really?
My mother's trust in me was like bands of steel that could not be broken. I could not think of disappointing my mother.
God bless the mothers of today as they prepare the latter-day stripling warriors of tomorrow!
What a contrast between books and how I feel after reading them. Yesterday I read about the Chinese Tiger Mother. Constantly yelling at her two daughters. Blood pressure high, stress levels to the max, contention, disarray, lack of harmony and peace. Where's the loving mother/daughter bond with this cold, demanding drill sergeant? One daughter confident but doesn't know how to have fun, the other broken, lacking confidence, and fighting so hard to be her own self.
Contrast this to the faithful, strong, dependable "mediocre" athlete/student/musician missionaries who were nurtured and shaped by their mothers. The respect, admiration, and love they feel for their mothers and consequently toward humanity.
One book is of oppression at the expense of happiness in agency. The other is training a child in which to go and not departing from it. It's great to have a "successful" child based on the world's standards but not at the expense of having a well-adjusted and Successful child who knows who they are, knows who we all are, and contributes to the happiness of our Heavenly Father's children.
The kind of Mother I hope to be: Kind. Gentle. Soft-spoken. Sweet. Nurturing. Supportive. Caring. Still. Peaceful. Tender. Warm. Loving. Prayerful. Strong. Clear. Assertive. Strict. Teacher. Expectations. Energetic. Enthusiastic. Fun. I don't ever want to yell at my children, intentionally hurt their feelings, or disappoint them. I hope to have a strong tie and connection with them. To build a lasting and eternal relationship of trust, belief, love, and compassion. I want to be the kind of mother my kids want to be around. I want the room I'm in to be their favorite room. I want them to want to be with me forever, out of respect, love, and enjoyment, not resentment, obligation and fear.
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